That guy

Oh yeah, you know who "that guy" is. The one that looks painfully perplexed and somewhat out of place. I have always thought of myself as cool. In fact, I only see cool in the mirror. Others have told me that they see nerd when looking at me, but I forgive them as they clearly need glasses or a stronger prescription.

Well, alas, I have to admit that this afternoon, I for a very brief fleeting miniscule moment for 15 looooooong minutes, I stepped into the skin of "that guy" and let me tell you it is not a good feeling. Not at all. Allow me to set the scene:

It's tax-free weekend on clothes and other school goodies here in our fair Commonwealth. I made the somewhat courageous decision to trek to the local Kohl's store. If you don't know what Kohl's is, it's a semi-department store, semi-home goods, semi-junk type of emporium. The thing about this store is there is ALWAYS a sale. Always. So much so that the word sale is redundant. The thesaurus should have a picture of this place for the phrase price reduction. 

The parking lot was crammed with all sorts of vehicles great and small. Target (another store) is next door and the grocery store is not far either. It was automotive insanity! I always park at the Pluto end of the lot. No different today, except I didn't really have a choice. 

After perusing the sale aisles (the whole place- remember), I, with a skip in my step and a song in my heart, proceeded to go to my car. Except..... my car is very small as is my capacity to remember where I park, so, you guessed it- I couldn't find it! 

Let me tell you, these were the most grueling 15 minutes of my life. Surely not Whorhol material. It was a mixture of hiding from the withering glances of strangers ("Look ma, it's THAT GUY!") and the bubbling hot asphalt that made a sauna seem arctic and blistered my tootsies to no end.

I did not hide my shame nor did I crumble in the face of such adversity! No, I trundled on from lane to lane sweating more profusely each time. "WHERE IN THE HELL IS THAT LITTLE BLACK CAR OF MINE!!!!!" I swore gently to myself.....

Then I remembered that I had driven Kim's car today and it was in the next lane over.  I had walked past it at least five times.